Standing on the fire escape outside our apartment
I look through the window at you

I’ve spent all day thinking about getting knocked down
and about that one group archaeological trip I went on in university

underground, or we talked about going underground
into a tunnel carrying our pencils so we could crack them in half to ward off badgers

(apparently badgers are vicious creatures)

I was smoking at the time
I always loved smoking more than I loved myself

after that I went on trips alone, walking for miles into the countryside outside my town
trying not to get knocked down on blind corners while smoking

O, I did survey a castle with someone once
inside people smoked joints while we carried around clipboards and measuring tape

I shout all this through the window at you over the traffic noise
just because I’m telling you the truth doesn’t make it real